


Poison

by BuffyImpala20



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Adult Language, Angst, F/M, Fluff, Hurt!Sam Winchester, Implied Smut, Oneshot, Sam Winchester Angst, Sam Winchester Fluff, angsty oneshot
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-06-18
Updated: 2018-06-18
Packaged: 2019-05-25 00:24:17
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,849
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14965076
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BuffyImpala20/pseuds/BuffyImpala20
Summary: Reader's charachter is inspired by Faith's character from "Buffy, the Vampire Slayer" + oneshot inspired by "Poison" by Alice Cooper.“You be a good girl now and don’t move your hands. I’m gonna drive you crazy, then stop, then do it all over again until you beg me to finish this. Even then, I won’t. I’m just gonna do everything I want to you until your mind and body explode.” Well, you didn’t think this kind of things agreed with you, turns out it’s what you needed, after a lifetime of being in control.Sam blew your mind the first time you slept together, you were just putty in his hands from then on. He can do whatever he wants. And he does, over and over, until you beg for mercy that never comes on first ask.





	Poison

You met Sam on a Thursday night at a hunters bar just outside Denver. You noticed him as soon as he entered the place: tall, long hair, broad shoulders. You raised the glass at your friend behind the counter and chugged the last of the beer.  
“Aggressive as always, uh?” she whispered, watching you walk towards the table where Sam was sitting.  
“I thought I should come to you before some other girl did,” you offered him your hand “Y/N.”  
It was clear that neither of you wanted to continue the small talk, so, after about an hour, you brought him back to your motel room.  
You were the one who pursued him that night, but from the moment you stepped into your room Sam was the one in control.  
“You be a good girl now and don’t move your hands. I’m gonna drive you crazy, then stop, then do it all over again until you beg me to finish this. Even then, I won’t. I’m just gonna do everything I want to you until your mind and body explode.” Well, you didn’t think this kind of things agreed with you, turns out it’s what you needed, after a lifetime of being in control.  
Sam blew your mind the first time you slept together, you were just putty in his hands from then on. He can do whatever he wants. And he does, over and over, until you beg for mercy that never comes on first ask.

—

You didn’t hear from Sam for a few months, until you got a text from him warning you about some angel thing.  
Y/N: So, was that a group text or are you actually worried about me?  
Sam: Both. Be careful.  
Y/N: Do I really look like the kind of girl who can’t handle herself?  
Sam: Oh, you can handle yourself alright. These angels are dangerous though, I’ve met them before.  
Y/N: I asked around. Doesn’t sound like you and your brother are scared of much. Do I need to be worried?  
Sam: Just be careful. Keep your eyes open for omens and things like that.  
Y/N: I’ve got my stash of sacred oil. If they come my way I’ll be ready.  
Sam: If they come your way, you run.  
Y/N: Don’t think so.  
From that moment on you two started talking every day. At first it was only about hunts and killings, then things got more interesting. You found out you don’t have a lot in common, except for being raised like soldiers by obsessive parents, but your conversations are never boring. If there’s something wrong you talk about it, Sam always listens without judgement and never comments until you ask him to. Then he comes up with some good advice. He never mocks unless you need a good kick up the butt.

You’ve had the chance to hunt together and, with time, yours became a weird relationship. You are best friends, yes, but you are also attracted to each other, so you try to meet as much as possible. Every time a different motel, every time a different city.

—

You and Sam have been on and off for about four years now. The hunting life doesn’t allow settling down and the both of you seem to be okay with it. “See each other where we can, when we can”, that’s the deal.

Sex with Sam is amazingly hot and passionate and, at least in part, it’s probably because you spend a lot of your time together yelling at each other. Every time the same story: you are too careless with your life, you don’t think things through, you have to be more cautious…

—

You and Sam decided to meet in Utah this time. Because of some vampires, people were disappearing and turning up drained of their blood, but today you were finally able to slay the fuckers; still, on the ride back to the motel, Sam keeps nervously clenching his hands around the wheel. He’s extremely focused on the road and doesn’t say a word until he suddenly pulls over the car. You watch him get out and sit against the hood.  
After you joined him, Sam takes a deep breath in and starts talking without looking at you.  
“We were about to die today. You risked our lives.” His hand is open in front of him, as it always is when he’s explaining something. “You don’t enter a vampires’ nest without a plan. We didn’t know how many there were, if they had weapons, hostages…”  
“Hey, big guy. Don’t sweat it. Everything worked out fine! Come on, let’s go celebrate.” You say, seductively putting your hand on his chest.  
“I’m serious, Y/N. You need to think before you act.”  
“Blah, blah, blah. Uh, nobody got hurt! A vampire entered the nest holding a guy by his neck. What?! You wanted to talk about it? No, you need to get in and get the job done. Machete and wooden bullets, that’s all you need.”  
“Today you just got lucky!” He’s scary when he yells.  
“Hey, I can do my job! I’m alive, aren’t I? I save people every day. I can handle myself and you know that!”  
“What if I hadn’t been there, uh?! Would have you survived?”  
“I had everything under control! I could have done it myself!” You say, knowing full well you’re lying.  
“Oh, somehow I strongly doubt that!”  
“Sam, you can’t plan everything.”  
“That’s what you do. You dive in head first and wait for someone to catch you. I’m not always around to help you. What if I’m not there the next time?”  
“Nobody asked you to follow me!”  
“Sure” he sighed. “I’m tired. You always do this. It’s like you enjoy seeing me in pain, worried sick about you.” Sam takes a step back from you.  
“Nobody asked you to be my guardian angel. We can end this. Whatever this is. It’s over, if you want.”  
“See? You’re doing it again! You see me struggling and you keep kicking me down. I’m saying that I worry about you and you push me away. You’re… God, you’re cruel.”  
Your eyes are wide open now. You don’t know what to say anymore.  
“I- I’m sorry. I’ve always been on my own. I guess I’m just not good with people. I don’t want to see you hurting because of me. Just… Just bring me back to the motel, I’ll take my stuff and I’ll leave. You don’t have to deal with this, with me.”  
“You can’t see it, Y/N. You don’t understand. I can’t. If I could end this I would have done it a long time ago. I know you’re bad for me, but I can’t let you go. You’re like… You’re poison running deep through my veins. I can’t shake you. I’m caught in your fucking web.” Sam is now avoiding your look.  
You’re speechless. You didn’t know he felt like this about you and your mind went back to all of those times he had asked you to move into the bunker, “just so you wouldn’t hunt alone” he used to say. You’re starting to understand that those words held more meaning than you initially had thought.  
But this isn’t possible, is it? In your lives there is no place for romantic feelings and love. Any association with the emotion had been a bad one, and your body just learned to reject it, like a foreign substance. The way your mother handled you, the way your best friend left you, the way men treated you.  
You turn your back on Sam and remain in silence. You need time to process what’s happening.  
Sam places his hands on your shoulders. His words are now just whispers into your hears. “Say something, say something…”  
You turn around, tears streaming down your eyes.  
“You’re crying, you’re not cold like ice, after all. I’d like to hold you, but I don’t know what you’re thinking. I never know what you’re thinking.”  
You’re confused. Do you want this? Is this something you want?  
Words leave you. You stare into those bright hazel eyes filled with chaos, and your heart falls silent. “Answer me!” he demands. But you can’t will your lips to move.  
“Y/N, please.” Sam starts yelling again. “I can’t take this! It’s been four years since… Since we started doing this and sometimes I feel like I don’t even know you. This is gonna come out wrong, but it seems to me as if I can get close to you only when… When we have sex. Sometimes when I’m inside you… I think about hurting you, just to hear you screaming my name louder and louder. It’s messed up, but in that way I would know that in that moment, at least in that moment, you’re feeling something. Because of me. For me.”  
Your mind is blank and you stare at him in shock. His eyes desperately search yours, waiting. You look for something reasonable to say, but to your surprise your heart answers for you.  
“What? You think I’m some heartless bitch?! No, no, you don’t need to hurt me to make me feel something. I- I feel everything. All the time. Sometimes all these things come rushing down on me and I can’t control any of it. Rage, passion, pain… Everything raises from my chest and the only way I know how to deal with is punching something. Or being drunk, or being in someone’s bed. I can’t stop. I can’t stop, Sam. If I do, then I realize that my mother was just a maniac, that my best friend was torn apart in front of me and… And that apparently the only man who has ever treated me with some respect thinks that I’m… I’m cold and cruel.”  
“Well, don’t know if you’ve noticed, but I’m all pins and needles myself. You’re not the only one with childhood traumas and dead loved ones. You can stop, you can, Y/N. I wanna love you. Let me love you.”  
Sam sees the comfort register on your face before you can hide it. A small smile plays on his lips.  
Sammy’s closer to you now and all you want to do is tasting his lips. And you do. You kiss him and it’s different from the other times, it’s reassuring in ways that words can never be.  
You part for a brief moment and all you can manage is a “Yes” before he starts kissing you again, leading you into the car.  
Sam is all logic and words until he touches your skin. Then something not only stirs in him, but it takes over his thinking. The rest of the world becomes an unimportant blur that is banished from his mind. The only thing that matters now is touching you more, kissing your mouth, your stomach… He tries to be gentle with your clothing, not to rip the black lace, but it’s hard. His hands were made for digging graves and killing monsters rather than undoing tiny clasps.


End file.
